I was a people-pleaser. I didn’t want people to be sad. I didn’t want them to think badly of themselves. That, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. But I did it at the expense of my wants, needs, and sanity.
It took me years to get over people-pleasing. I would let folks be right even when what they were saying was definitely wrong. I stayed in relationships long past their expiration date. I belittled myself and made myself small so others could feel better about themselves. But in the process, I lost myself. It left me feeling sad, empty, and unaccomplished.
If this sounds familiar, know you’re not alone and can break free. Let’s discuss why people-pleasing is ruining your life and how to stop it.
Why People-Pleasing is Hurting You
- It Drains Your Energy – You spend so much time ensuring others are happy that you neglect your needs.
- It Leads to Resentment – Over time, constantly saying “yes” to things you don’t want to do builds frustration and bitterness.
- You Lose Your Authentic Self – When you focus on meeting others’ expectations, you might forget what makes you happy.
- It Keeps You Stuck – When you’re always worried about others think, you may hesitate to take risks, set boundaries, or make changes that could improve your life.
How to Stop People-Pleasing
- Recognize the Pattern – The first step is acknowledging that you tend to put others’ needs before your own. Pay attention when you say “yes” out of guilt or fear rather than genuine desire.
- Practice Saying “No” – This can feel uncomfortable at first, but saying “no” doesn’t make you selfish—it makes you honest. Try responses like, “I’d love to help, but I don’t have the time right now.”
- Set Boundaries – You don’t have to be available to everyone 24/7. Start setting limits on your time, energy, and commitments.
- Prioritize Yourself – Ask yourself, What do I want? What do I need? Then, start making decisions based on your happiness and well-being.
- Let Go of Guilt—Saying “no” doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you a person who respects yourself.
Breaking free from people-pleasing isn’t easy, but it’s one of the most important things you can do for yourself. You deserve to live a life that reflects your values, dreams, and happiness, not one dictated by the expectations of others. When you start setting boundaries, prioritizing your needs, and letting go of guilt, you reclaim your power and achieve confidence and fulfillment. Remember, you are worthy just as you are. So, take that first step—choose yourself t
Ready to Take Back Control of Your Life?
If you’re ready to stop people-pleasing and start living life on your terms, download our free guide, Embrace Your Next Chapter. It is a powerful resource designed to help midlife women reinvent themselves with confidence.
📥 Download it now!
And don’t forget to visit Renee & Ruby’s to shop our It’s Not Over Until I Win collection—featuring our brand-new “Until I Win” T-shirt—and enjoy 20% off for a limited time.
Until next time, take care of yourself and each other.
With Peace & Love,
Renee
Midlife Made Easier: Essential Resources for Reinventing Yourself
Explore these empowering resources designed to support your journey of self-discovery, confidence, and well-being in midlife.
🔹 “I Am” Mandala Coloring Book Relax, reflect, and rediscover your strength with 46 beautifully crafted pages featuring powerful “I Am” affirmations. Boost creativity, mindfulness, and inner peace.
🔹 “It’s Not Over Until I Win” Collection Visit Renee & Rubys, our online store, and declare your resilience with this inspiring collection. Wear your strength proudly and remind yourself daily that you have what it takes to keep going. [Get 20% off with code ENJOY]
🔹 “Embrace Your Next Chapter” Guide This free guide is a roadmap for midlife women ready to reinvent themselves. Discover self-exploration exercises, goal-setting strategies, health and wellness tips, and confidence-building techniques to create a fulfilling new chapter.
Your next chapter starts now—embrace it with confidence and purpose! 💖
Midlife Made Easier 